Why Introverts Feel More Anxious When Speaking (And What You Can Do About It)
Ever wonder why some people seem calm and collected in high-pressure moments, while others freeze up, overthink, or feel like their heart is about to beat out of their chest?
If you’re an introvert, you’re not imagining it – your nervous system is literally wired to respond more intensely.
The Science Behind Introvert Anxiety
Research shows that introverts have more highly reactive amygdalae than extroverts. The amygdala is the ancient part of the brain responsible for detecting threats and triggering our fight-or-flight response. When it senses something unfamiliar or overwhelming – like speaking up in a room full of people – it raises our heart rate, spikes our cortisol, and sends us into survival mode.
For introverts, this response can be triggered by things that extroverts barely notice.
We tend to have more sensitive nervous systems overall. New people, new smells, loud environments – our brains process these stimuli more deeply. Even our skin reacts more quickly: studies have found that introverts sweat more than extroverts, whose skin tends to be thicker and less reactive.
In her book Quiet, Susan Cain says the phrase “cool, calm, and collected” may have originated from this very contrast – extroverts often appear literally “cooler” under pressure. (This is an affiliate link. I only recommend books I genuinely believe are worth reading.)
What This Means in Real Life
If you’ve ever:
blanked out in a meeting, even though you practiced what to say
avoided speaking up because your heart was pounding
replayed a conversation for hours afterward, wondering if you sounded stupid
…it doesn’t mean you’re bad at communication.
It means your body is trying to protect you from perceived social threat.
The Good News: You Can Work With Your Nervous System
You can learn to regulate your nervous system, quiet your racing thoughts, and speak with calm, grounded confidence, even when the stakes feel high.
When that happens, something shifts: speaking up stops feeling like a threat and starts feeling like an opportunity. You’ll start enjoying talking in meetings, presentations, and everyday conversations.
That’s exactly what I help my clients do through 1:1 coaching.
Ready to Communicate with More Calm and Clarity?
If you’re an introvert who wants to stop spiraling after conversations and start feeling steady in the moment, I’d love to help.
Learn more about my coaching program.
You don’t need to push through your anxiety alone.
Communicate with less anxiety and more influence
My work is about helping you share your voice and strengthen your relationships through better communication. Together, we’ll interrupt patterns like perfectionism, fear of judgment, and people-pleasing so you can create lasting change – and feel more at ease in every speaking situation.
I’m an American expat living in the U.K., and I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design a life that feels rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.